Border Patrol

Our last views of Croatia (Dubrovnik) before heading into Here Be Dragons territory

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A big aspect of this trip is that we don’t really have a major plan. Associated with that is that we didn’t do any planning at all.

Planning means research.

Research would have been helpful as it turns out.

We hit the border of Croatia and Montengro with high spirits. The road from Split had been really fun to ride and we’d seen some good sights. Coming up to the guards window, I removed my helmet and smiled politely at the guard as I handed over my passport.

“Motorsickle documents and green card.”

“Um, sorry, what?”

“Motorsickle documents and green card.”

“Er… do you mean our vehicle registration documents?”

“Yes. And green card. Insurance.”

“Um, well, they are in London.”

Turns out that crossing into Montenegro and Albania wasn’t as straight forward as we had thought. Or not thought as the case may be. But manage we did, by smiling lots, talking quickly, thowing in the odd joke, pleading ignorance, and generally just waiting until someone gave in. And give in they did.

It was unsettling though as we both dreaded the idea of being stopped by local Police and being put in a situation where a bribe would have to come into play (and we had it confirmed that this would have been the case). So we drove as responsibly as we could, overly so, and decided to get back into an EU country as quickly as possible. We did both countries in two nights, one 8 hour day and one 12 hour day riding.

The Greeks smiled and welcomed us back. Our relief was evident and accompanied by a much needed high five.

Haunted room

Haskovo, Bulgaria

Tris looked nervous. He’d just come back from organising some gear in the room we were staying in and he had the heebie jeebies.

“I don’t believe in ghosts, spooks or things similar, but I was just alone in that room and I felt really uncomfortable. It was like someone was very curious about what I was doing and I didn’t want to look in the mirror in case I saw someone standing over my shoulder.”

I’d been in the room on my own earlier but didn’t feel a thing so I was mildly curious about what Tris had experienced. Still, worrying about ghosts was far from my mind when I eventually hit the bed exhausted. But, were we alone…(dum dum dum da)

At some stage during the wee smalls I woke to a loud noise. Something had banged loudly on the door. Hearing Tris moving on his mattress I figured it was him kicking the door as his feet could touch it easily. Something else felt strange though – the sheet I had on me felt like it had been pulled off, which is actually what woke me up. Too tired to worry or think about it, I just pulled them back on, curled up inside them and fell back asleep.

In the morning we spoke about it and the door being banged was in fact Tris kicking the door. But he did it though as he’d been woken by some blankets falling onto his head.

Was this room haunted? We didn’t stay to investigate more.

Local talent

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Tris is not very impressed with the local talent here in Kavala, Greece.

Croatia

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I can’t say I have the best memories of Croatia because for most of my time there I was sick. On our first night near the capital I managed to eat something which didn’t go down to well, so on our second day of riding I had to stop often as I felt like either vomiting or having the squirts. Luckily I did neither but there were some times where it was a close call.

We were told the Croatian coastline was amazing but my enthusiasm for enjoying the view was overcome by a desire to share my insides with the side of the road. We did both comment that what passed for beaches were actually rocky patches or concrete areas that you could barely see for people. I don’t think we were impressed.

We spent two nights in a town called Split, where our good friend Caterina (from London) offered to put us up for the  couple of nights when our accommodation fell through. Apparently “yes, we want the room” means “yes, we want the room, but feel free to give it to someone else if they get there before us” in Croatia. I needed a break and time to recover and we had been riding quite hard to get here so felt like some chill out time.

Cat went to Croatia to get away from it all, so we decided to help her by making a mess of her apartment with all our gear. Tris’ snoring kept her awake the first night, but lucky for her I was still awake with stomach pains and severe heartburn to keep her company. I’m sure she relished our farting and burping, crude jokes, indecision, mess and general boyness. What better way to relax than with friends.

The day I dropped Donkey

View across Vilac

I’m not the dumbest guy in the world but I certainly felt like it when Tris and I decided to go visit the local historic castle in Villac, Austria.

The road up there was incredibly steep, so being the lazy arses we are, we road up on our bikes. To be even mre lazy, we skipped all the sensible flat parking bays further from the castle, and road straight to the parking directly at the entrance. The problem we faced was the angle of the road and parking bays was quite steep.

Tris made a first attempt to park and almost took out an old lady. While he corrected himself, I managed to successfully face up hill and then reverse my bike into the parking bay. I was quite chuffed with myself… I made it look easy.

The problem I next faced was getting my bike on my stand. The stand was on the uphill side and when I extended it my bike was completely upright. I decided to test if it was balanced by taking my right foot off the ground.

I started to fall down hill to the right.

No worries, I thought, I’ll just put my foot down again. But by now it was too late. The weight of my fully laden bike was too much and my foot was slipping. For several seconds I managed to stop Donkey from slamming into the ground but she kept on falling further over, and I couldn’t hold the weight on my one precariously placed foot. Eventually I just had to let go and she hit the ground while I went flying into the red car next to me.

Dumb arse.

My time at the gym wasn’t enough. I struggled to get Donkey even a few inches up off the ground, and still faced the issues of some simple maths; angles, weight, and me.

A man who sensibly parked further down the hill passed and immediately jumped to help. Tris, after sensibly parking at the flatter bit further up, eventually came back down and put his shoulder into it as well. After a short while all three of us managed to get Donkey upright and held her there long enough for me to get back on her and started (she flooded).

I parked further up, and we settled down to enjoy the amazing view at the café inside the castle walls, ordering a well earned coca-cola to settle the nerves.

The air up there

It’s  hard life sometimes…

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Let there be beer… and plenty of it

Villach friends at the Beer Festival

Villach friends at the Beer Festival

Part of the fun of this trip is the fact we don’t really have a definite plan of where we are going. We have a rough idea, with a need for me to be in Paris on the 26th of August, but where we stay each night is partly up to random chance.

By random chance we ended up in Villach in Austria. We had intended on making it to Lubijubijubi (I can never remember how to say or spell that place) in Slovenia, but a local festival was making it hard to find a place to stay. By midday we had decided to go elsewhere, and sent out some couchsurfing requests to places this side of the Austrian/Slovenian border. Within an hour we had a friendly “Yes” from a lovely woman called Nikki. Just by chance, Villach was also having a local festival… a beer festival. The gods be praised!

Nikki invited us to join her and some friends for some pre-festival drink, and then out to the festival with them. The festival was manic. There were thousands of people filling the streets, most dressed in traditional costume. We picked a beer tent that had a huge pig on a spit roasting outside it (it was awesome… hmmm, meat), opposite another tent playing some traditional Austrian music (which sounded like it was out of the 60s). We all got into the swing of things though by drinking beer an eating pork. Nom nom nom.

MEAT!

MEAT!

The festival was huge though. It took us forever to walk all the way through the streets jam-packed full of (drunken) people. They had fair-ground rides, and not just the small piddly ones either. I lost Tristan at one stage but found a bar selling more beer (like it was hard to find), where I waited with a young couple who I’d met earlier that night, talking about random drunken crap and giving them my sagely advice. Eventually Tris turned up with a grin on his face, and we all then found a taxi back to where we were staying. It was close to 4pm by the time we got to sleep.

Whimper

I couldn’t wait to get off the bike after our second day of riding. We travelled over 500kms on long boring motorways. Our aim is to get as far East as quickly as possible, but with 25k to go before our destination of the day, Besacon, I just wanted to get off the bike. In fact when we stopped, I got my helmet off as quickly as possible and threw my jacket on the ground. We had both had enough, especially after fairly much no sleep the night before.

Our plan for an early night went out the window when we took our host our for a meal, and then she suggested a walk up to the citadel. The view was great but the walk back to her house was draining. We didn’t get to bed until 1AM, which wasn’t good considering we had to get up at 6:30AM. Whimper.

The next day was a mad dash to Chur in Switzerland (nothing exciting happened), and then bout 580kms from there to where we are now; Villach in Austria.

And we are off…

Well, we were sort of off. The torrential rain in the morning wasn’t an encouraging start to our trip but by the time we actually hit the road it had cleared up.

I had promised myself I wouldn’t take as much gear with me this time. As I hefted my chokka full bag onto the back of my bike, forced closed my full top box and wiggled the jam packed tank bag into place, I wish I had remembered that promise. Dick.

We only had a short ride down to Folkestone then a few hours on the other side to a place called Amien for our first day. I remembered riding being exhilirating, and it definitely was that and more. The “more” bit was remembering how squashed one’s balls get, how sore one’s arse gets and how tiring it can all be. But we made it fine and were greeted by the friendly face of Anna our first Couchsurfing host. She set the standards pretty high as she plied us with beer and put on a BBQ. We hung out with her, her boyfriend and housemates for the night, with our incredibly poor ability to speak French not being much of a hinderance. Tris tries to speak the local lingo better than I do and has been a inspiration.

The highlight of day one was Tris learning how to remove a bottle cap from beer bottle using a lighter. I’m glad I was there to witness him finally becoming a real man.

The train ride over

Just in the Nick of time… maybe.

Best present opening experience ever.

Donkey gets out of the box

I’ve finally got all my Donkey drama sorted. After some legal advice I’ve had to accept the way things are and just pay to get my bike back. It was going to take far too long and cost me way too much to fight Anglo Pacific about the way I’ve been treated. That said, I’ve been told the Office of Fair Trading is going to do a review (which I must chase up).

The next thing I had to do was take her to a mechanic. Six hundred pounds later (MOT, chain and sprockets, new front break pad, lots of work fixing fused front callipers, oil filter, air filter and a new battery) she was ready to go. Unfortunately still not legal to ride.

I also got insurance, but then had to go through a process of getting Donkey re-registered and taxed. An hour at the DVLA in Sidcup and all was sorted… sort of. I’ve got to wait for the documentation to come through before I can take Donkey for a drive. I leave at the end of next week… still no documents. Sigh.

I’m sure they will be get here just in time.

I hope

The most important thing is that I have Donkey back. I’m a very happy man. Can’t wait to get out riding around Europe with Tristan again.